Gedain San gmo, female, was born in 1918 in Benjor Lhunbo Village, Gyangze County Tibet. Her Mother was a hereditary nangzen (household slave) of the Padha family, an aristocrat family The woman didn1t have any land to
till and a house to keep off cold in winter and heat in summer until the Democratic Reform in 1959. Gedain San gmo is now living wfth others in the Home of Respect for the Old.

　　I am 82 years old this year. Talking about the 82 years, I feel sad and, at the same time, happy. I was born and brought up in Benjor Lhunbo Village. As Mother was a nangzen (household slave), I was born nangzen. I had no idea who was my Father. Since young, I lived with Mother in a dark and wet hut. Mother was charged with weaving pulu woolen rug for the Parlha family. She went to work before it dawned. The Parlha family supplied breakfast and supper-zanba (roasted highland barley flour) porridge which was a mixture ofzanba, salt and water. For lunch, she ate whatever she brought with herself and drank tea offered by the master. Lunch break lasted for one hour, and after this she had to work on and on until it got dark. Mothers yearly income amounted to 208 kg of grain and a roll ofpulu woolenrug. The 208 kg of grain was mixed with grass and mud, so the net weight was no more than 100 kg. And the pulu woolenrug could be used to make Tibetan boots only by the present standard, and was barely enough to make a piece of Tibetan robe. With wolf at the door, we had no choice but to sell PU1U Mother was given for a meager income.

　　At 13, I was old enough to work for the master as a nangzen, too. I did oddjobs in the manor. Later, Jigzen Guixoi, aunt of Zhaxi Wangqug, the manorial lord, made me her private servant. The lady was tonsured to a nunnery in the mountain gully, and returned home seldomly. I stayed with her in the nunnery, where I learned to recite sutras from her. As a nun, she reflised to marry. As her private maid, I was not allowed to contact any man. At 28, however. I fell in love with a man, who was also a nangzen charged with making Tibetan boots in the manor, and I was conceived. The manorial lord and her aunt flew into a rage, and my boy friend ran out of the area under the cloak of darkness. He never ventured to return thereafter. Next year, I gave birth to a daughter.

　　When my daughter was only five days old, I was made to go on working for the master. I brought my daughter with myself, but when the master found this out, he refused to let me take my daughter with myself. Having no way out, I had to send my daughter to Mother.

　　Mother had "retired" because she was more than 60 years old then. She was weaving carpets and woolen fabrics for others in Gyangze. Each year she had to deliver 40 taels of Tibetan silver to the manorial lord as poll tax.

　　I led a life devoid of meaning when my daughter had been sent to Mother. Finally, I fell ill, and was forced to go on working for the master as soon as I could rise to my feet.

Mother died when my daughter was seven years old. The girl returned to work for the master, too. She kept complaining I failed to take good care of Mother, and we maintained ill relationship.

　　In 1959, when I was 41 years old, the Democratic Reform was conducted in Tibet. My daughter and I were allotted 1.1 hectares of land, a large house, three sheep and some other daily necessities. We were also given farm tools and seeds. Mutual aid teams were organized and I joined one of them. Though I had never done any farm work before, I managed to learn.

　　My daughter and I often quarreled even when she got married. So, I lived alone again. In 1986, when I was 68 years old, the Home of Respect for the Old was set up in the area, I moved in together with four others. I was the oldest of the five, but I am the only one who is still alive today. Each year I receive 310 yuan as subsidies from the Civil Affairs Administration of Gyangze County for the purchase of clothes, buffer and some other daily necessities. The supply ofzanba and fuel comes from the nine villages in the township in turn. Households of Benjor Lhunbo Village take turns to take care of my daily life. Everyday, when the person comes, he/she brings me a pot of buttered tea. Members of the village Party and Communist Youth League committees take the lead in doing so. In a sense, I am like the ex-lord who lived on supplies from all. During the Tibetan New Year, township and village leaders pay me special visit. The county government also sends people to ask after me, bringing me gifts including tea, butter, mutton and clothes. I enjoy free medicare in the township and county hospitals.

　　I am 82 years old. As one who worked with might and main like cows and horses in the past, I am satisfied with my happy life during the twilight years. I own much to the Communist Party of China. Everyday, I chant Buddhist scriptures and spin prayer wheel. Sometimes, I go taking ritual walk along the Lingkor Road in Gyangze County seat. I developed the habit when I was a private maid for Jigzen Guixoi, aunt of Zhaxi Wangqug, the manorial lord. Last year, I felt extremely lonely staying the whole day in the Home of Respect for the Old, and asked the village chief to send me to a nearby nunnery. After some time there, I thought I would not be able to stay in the nunnery for the rest of my life. I asked the village chief to bring me back to the Home, and he did. The government follows the policy of freedom of religious belief, so I am free to go and free to return. The government and the village have done much for me. Compared with Mother, I am happier. I am satisfied with my present life.

(Recorded by Xu Ping)